You May Have Some Questions, Kevin Costner

It occurs to us, Mr. Costner, that you may have some questions about this whole If I Blog It, They Will Come venture. You may feel that, before you indulge us with a response, you need to know a little more about where we are coming from. It’s only fair -- and we wouldn’t have it any other way. We have taken the initiative to anticipate any queries you might have, and endeavored to answer them as best we can. Hopefully the Q&A below will clear a few things up, and speed your response to our efforts:

Q: Are you guys for real?

A: Yes, Mr. Costner -- we are very much for real. We are genuine fans of you and your films, and would love to have you send us a picture of you reading our blog.

Q: And this blog isn’t just some irony-laden attempt to make me look foolish?

A: No, sir. Indeed we think if you were to send us a picture of yourself checking out the blog, it would make you look like a really cool guy to your millions of fans. Not that you need US to make YOU look cool.

Q: How can I be sure you are such big fans of mine?

A: Any average Joe can claim they are a Kevin Costner by citing Dances with Wolves or Field of Dreams. But how many sites would claim that your greatest performance is as Gardner Barnes, leader of The Groovers, in Fandango. Or rage at the injustice of all of your scenes as getting cut out of The Big Chill. Does the fair-weather Costner fan know you starred in 3 separate films directed by Kevin Reynolds? At If I Blog It, They Will Come -- we know our Costner!

Q: Okay, I’m impressed. But can you connect me to Kevin Bacon in that Six Degrees of Separation game?

A: That’s easy -- one degree: JFK

Q: Everybody knows that one! Try a little harder.

A: You were in Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves with Christian Slater, who was in Murder in the First with KEVIN BACON!

Q: I'm not that impressed yet...what else you got?

A: You starred in For Love of the Game with John C. Reilly, who appeared in Boogie Nights with Philip Seymour Hoffman. Hoffman played opposite Tom Cruise in Mission: Impossible 3. Cruise starred in A Few Good Men with Kevin Bacon. We beg the question, if it's so easy to connect you to Kevin Bacon isn't there enough evidence to suggest a name change to Six Degrees of Kevin Costner.

Q: Wow -- you guys really are good!

A: How about some more Costner trivia? Your production company is called Tig Productions. All of your children appeared with you in The Postman, which you also directed. You played the pilot in "The Mission", one of the only two episodes of Amazing Stories that were directed by Steven Spielberg…

Q: Jeez, enough already! How do I get you guys to shut up?

A: Just e-mail a picture of yourself reading this blog to djayek@yahoo.com.


Special Thanks to A. Morton for his contribution